OrthodoxBlonde

You know you’re feeling better again when:

(a) You listen to the Beach Boys on your walk to work.

(b) You choose to wear your brand new, screaming red tights.

(c) You buy a new a pair of shoes.

(d) All of the above.

I’ve been feeling the colored tights vibe for a while now. But I hesitated over the color. I ended up defaulting to red (the obvious choice), but I seriously considered purple. But purple–but particularly purple tights–is so 80′s, and I’m skittish of looking too costume-y. And too trendy since retro 80′s is so big now.

I thought about green tights, too. But in junior high I had a green, corduroy shirt dress from Eddie Bauer that I wore with matching green tights–and I want to say green loafers, but surely even at 12 I had better style sense that?!?

(Although, I should cut myself a little slack since my mom went through this period of dressing me in preppy Dockers plaid shirts and khakis–and penny loafers. (Oh god, the green loafers might be true!) So, I strongly suspect that the entire green outfit may have been selected and orchestrated by her. But even so, I was the one who walked out the front door wearing it.)

Anyway, kids at school used to tease me when I wore the outfit and called me (not surprisingly, or unfairly, for that matter) the “jolly green giant.” In short, it’s enough to put a person off green tights for life.

When I put on the red tights this morning I had a moment of doubt, and it occurred to me that I would have to be very careful about what I wore with them lest it degenerate into looking like a rogue elf from Santa’s work shop.

So, now I’m thinking that the solution to the colored tights quandry might be bright cobalt blue tights. Blue tights aren’t associated with any fairy-tale creatures like giants and elves, are they?

Web sites for clothing stores that are not actually functioning catalog sites–much less a functioning e-commerce site. Case in point: Uniqlo.

It was only through sheer persistence that I found the image below for a friend of mine who’s revving up to make his first suit purchase. (A big day in a man’s style life-cycle.) To get it, I had to sit through the “Uniqlo Look Spring 2007″ flash presentation and then take a screen-shot of the desired outfit. But there’s no price information, no sizing information, and no fabric/garment information.

I also wanted to see the woven shirt selection but did not have the patience for the “Experience Uniqlo Explorer.”

Never mind the fact that I’m not ready to buy yet. I’m getting ready to buy, and clothing web sites like Uniqlo’s help me not at all. Rather than luring me into the store to make a purchase, the frustration turns me off the brand as a whole.

The slim cut of the suit, though, is a winner. Big fan. And I will be reccomending it to my friend.

Other fashion branding funny business: Ck in2u

It may actually be a great perfume, but I suspect that the marketing campaign will be a flop. The original CK One campaign was targeted to the last mass media generation, Generation X. The Millennials are the first long-tail generation. They are a whole bunch of fragmented, niche audiences. Not one big audience like when the Gen X-ers were 20-somethings. (I would argue now, by the way, that the 30-something Gen X-ers are also niche audiences. The only mass media generation left are the Boomers.)

Millennials love being talked to by advertisers in campaigns that cater to a specific demographic subset. But it’s when advertisers try talking to all 20-somethings at the same time, that they feel they are being “talked at” and are turned off.

Of course, I could be way off base here and misunderstand the marketing message since I’m not a Gen-Xer, not a Millennial, have never worn CK One, and will probably never wear CK in2u. (If only because the name offends my grammatical sensibilities.)